¹⁷If then you regard me a partner, accept him as you would me. ¹⁸But if he has wronged you in any way or owes you anything, charge that to my account; ¹⁹I, Paul, am writing this with my own hand, I will repay it (not to mention to you that you owe to me even your own self as well).

Three more lines of reason come to the fore as if what Paul had already written was not enough to compel Philemon’s consent. This letter certainly provides a comprehensive pattern for making an appeal. Paul now makes the request very personal, putting himself and his relationship with Philemon on the line. He is calling on his spiritual/relational equity with Philemon.

First, the apostle challenges Philemon to receive Onesimus just as he would accept Paul. To deny this request would be tantamount to refusing to accept Paul. The shared relationship they have enjoyed is at stake.

Second, if Philemon intends to exact repayment of any kind from Onesimus, it will come out of Paul’s pocket, for the apostle is assuming Onesimus’ debt. (The backstory to this may be that the runaway slave stole from his master or at least caused economic setback due to the loss of service during his absence). This is a compelling tactic as it would be difficult for Philemon to ignore without doing financial harm to Paul.

Third, the apostle slips in a reminder of a more significant debt that Philemon owes to him. We take the phrase “you owe to me even your own self as well” to mean Paul was responsible for Philemon’s coming to Christ and receiving eternal life. The latter owes Paul a debt of gratitude and loyalty that eclipses all other obligations. Paul is now calling in this debt, to be transferred to Onesimus, the former runaway slave. Possibly Paul had in mind the parable Jesus told about one slave who was forgiven an enormous debt by his master, but who in turn would not forgive a smaller debt another slave owed him (Matt. 18:22-35). The master’s words ring out: “Should you not also have had mercy on your fellow slave, in the same way that I had mercy on you?” (Matt. 18:33).

To punctuate his bold approach, Paul emphasizes his comments using his own handwriting. Scholars have long understood that the apostle wrote his letters using an amanuensis, which is a secretary who put his words to writing (see Rom. 16:21). But here (as in 1 Cor. 15:21, Col. 4:18, 2 Thess. 3:17), he switches to his own penmanship. He wants to make sure Philemon does not doubt that it is the apostle Paul writing this letter. Surely this would be recognizable as authentic to the recipient of this hard-to-swallow instruction.

Lord, I want to be forgiving of others as You have forgiven me!