Taking On Marriage: Matthew 19:3-6

by | Matthew

3 Some Pharisees came to Jesus, testing Him and asking, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason at all?” 4 And He answered and said, “Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning made them male and female, 5 and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? 6 “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.”

Divorce proceedings supply ongoing business for lawyers today, with some research indicating upwards of 50% of all first time marriages ending in divorce. In Jesus’ time, divorce provided lucrative currency for the “one-up-manship” in ongoing debates over the Mosaic Law. Some held to a lenient view, a man could divorce his wife for just about any reason, while others held a more restricted view. Some Pharisees wanted to embroil Jesus in that debate (“testing him”) for their own purposes.

Rather than give a human opinion, Jesus rebuked them for not under­standing the simple description of marriage given in the early chapters of Genesis (He did a similar thing with Nicodemus in John 3:10,“Are you a teacher of the law and don’t understand these things?”) These things are foundational, so why is there a debate about them? Marriage was designed by God and He is the one who joins a man and woman together. His directive: marriage is inseparable. Therefore, any separation is against His intention for marriage. The case should be closed!

In the following verses, the Pharisees press for clarification, but we first note a few points of emphasis that Jesus makes. This union we call marriage dates to the beginning of creation of human beings, and is fundamental to humanity. Sexuality is at the core of who we are as either men or women. Sex distinctions are not simply incidental to life. So, marriage (that is, the proper relating of the sexes) is not incidental either, something to be altered by the customs and caprice of human desires.

Also, Jesus emphasized that when a man and woman come together, they become united as one flesh. Obviously this does not refer to loss of individual identity, but it conveys the strongest possible uniting of two individuals. God sees them as one and any separation will naturally produce irreparable harm, like the damage caused when separating two pieces of glued paper. His command to “let no man separate [them]” anticipates (and it has been proven true by history) that this union would be assaulted in succeeding generations.

Lord, the whole world system works against the permanence of marriage. Help me to honor and uphold my marriage and that of others.

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